After over a year of being home, away from their everyday routines, they are back, with their friends, teachers, their school….their stressors. Taking steps to help our children and teens reduce their stressors can help parents and their children feel better in the moment. Not only that, but also nurture more positive long-term health.
With the New School Year Underway: Here are a Few Ways to Help Children and Teens Learn How to Cope with Stress
In addition to all the stress people experience today, like so many parents, with our youngest just beginning high school and our older almost a junior in college starting her field experience, we are no strangers to stress.
Everyone experiences pressure, it is a routine part of everyday life. Stress in children does not always present itself the same as it does in adults. When experienced over a lengthy time period, for example, family tension, sports pressures, academic expectations, peer groups, homework or work, and stress negatively affect our children.
On one hand, normal tension can influence our children to work harder with their schoolwork, activities, or hobbies.
At the same time, if not monitored, too much acute stress is something we should be concerned about. Left unnoticed or unchecked, stress can lead to a multitude of problems for our young ones.
Just like adults, children and teens can also work with their parents or another trusted caregiver, teacher, or counselor to discover new outlets that can help them manage their stressors.
Taking steps to help them reduce stressors can help parents and their children feel better in the moment but also nurture more positive long-term health. Encourage positive programs that promote beneficial expression and support.
Children and adolescents need to know they are unconditionally loved, whether they pass/fail, do not get the part in the play or get elected to student council.
They need to know that we are proud of them, they are amazing, smart, and good-looking and we will be there to support them, no matter what.
Some instances of children and adolescent stressors are the expectations put on them as them grow to do better, be better. With all these stressors, children and teens can feel unaccepted, not good enough. To develop a positive self-approval, concentrate on their positive self-kindness; remind them to focus on themselves, with as much energy as they focus on school, their friends and family.
Be sure to schedule regular check-ins with your children and catch up on things they may be internalizing.
Huge teen stressors can be their social lives or even lack of one, academic status or the amount of accompanying work. Tension at home is a major source of pressure for children and teens. Stress trickles down, and when there is stress in the family unit, there is surely to be stress for children and teens. Working with a teacher, counselor or pastoral advisor may take away some of the very issues causing concern for all.
There are so many awesome resources to help our children and teens decompress. Some helpful ideas for your children and teens when coping with stress is to encourage healthy eating and sleeping habits. If a teen is up all-night playing video games or chatting with friends, then at school all day, they are going to have a difficult time focusing no matter what they try to do. Not to mention the negative health effects lack of sleep or bad diet can lead to.
Their friends can not only help with their stress but may also be a source of it. Keeping relationships with friends and working out any kinks that may come along is one of the best stress relievers out there. Especially for the past year or so, we have all missed out on the positive interactions we have with people at work or school because of the pandemic. Keeping those relationships open even if it is just a Zoom call, Face time, text message or good ol’ phone call, teens and children especially need these interactions to keep those healthy relationships open and assist with their mental health.
Try teaching your child how to balance time with their friends, schoolwork, and extra-curricular activities. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-help-your-kids-or-teens-find-balance-with-sports-school-and-family-life/ As much as they value their social lives and spent so much of their time among the friends, this can all include a good amount of stress at times. Be sure that they make the time for themselves to help with coping and any changes that may arise. Some great activities for teens and children to learn are Grounding, Mindfulness, https://positivepsychology.com/mindfulness-for-children-kids-activities/ and any form of exercise. Getting our younger children and teens into the great outdoors is an awesome way to get them to calm down by having them focus on a favorite place or something that makes them happy. https://childmind.org/article/why-kids-need-to-spend-time-in-nature/ Another option might be to have them try Mindfulness to them, maybe even get them to open up about what’s truly bugging them. Stress can manifest in different ways, while some symptoms of stress mimic normal teen behavior. If we accentuate our teens’ talents, strengths, and interests, we can support and inspire positive ways to nurture their concerns and highlight their strengths. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/positive-psychology-in-the-classroom/201307/what-happy-children-and-teens-do-differently
Teens may like to try journaling, listening to music or cooking. Anything to keep their minds directed at something present, other than their stressors is a good thing. It can provide them time to settle down, relax and possible talk or write about what is truly bothering them. If they agree, you may even be able to help guide them to figure out their best solution. As parents we naturally want to help and solve things for our children but with encouragement, reminding them how awesome they are and of the “I can do it” approach, they can be on their way to independence and be able to resolve things, without stressing too much, as the encounter them.
Even if they show some lack of interest, frustration, obstinate, or won’t open up to you right then and there, remind them of your ongoing support, and how much you love them. Helping them learn to manage conflict and work through possible romantic relationship are not easy for the developing teen. Bullying and relational aggression are definite sources of teen stress. Establishing and maintaining relationships, teens can engage in behavior consistent with their peers. Over time with consistency and dedication your child or teen will not only have more positive coping skills but may just come around and verbalize not only their stressors to you but so much more!
If you think you, your child or someone else you know may need someone to talk to because of high stress, anxiety, depression, or a mental health concern please contact a professional therapist or other mental health specialist in your area. They can provide the optimal resources and support based on each individual’s unique situation.
Ok I will finish this paper later
